Oh...the Shame!!

Okay so last night, I had to listen to the last like 8 chapters on cd of New Moon, JUST to feel less frustrated and like I was visualizing how is SHOULD have gone down. It did feel right visualizing it in my brain happening as it was read aloud to me. I used the actors who play them in the movies but just saw it as I feel it should have happened. But I am also worried since I am having trouble NOT getting OCD about stuff, that talking about it will get it stuck in my head, so I am going to close the Twilight box for now and put it away. Please brain, help me by obeying!!

Okay I have to admit to a SHAME. What I am watching right now, I have never watched before, I got sucked in though this season before knowing what I was watching!! I swear I had no idea what it was, but by the time I knew what I was watching, I was invested in seeing if any of these dirt bags could be redeemed!!

Yes, I admit it, I am ashamed to say I am right now watching Tool Academy 3!! *sob* Please do not lose respect for me!! I was channel surfing and found these people acting all full of themselves and then these people paraded out and these people all became aghast and looked like they wanted the Earth to swallow them whole. It was their significant others! And I could NOT stop watching! It was like a car wreck, you want to look away, but there is some morbid fascination in seeing what happens!

And there is now only 4 "tools" left. But I want to reach through the screen and MAKE these 3 women and 1 man ( yes there is a first, a toolette ) see that these people are SCUM and they needs to LEAVE them! Hardly any of the kicked off tools girlfriends broke up with them!! Idiots, these "tools" are all like, and I HATE this word, sluts. They are walking STD's. It grosses me out, and what makes it worse is all these other women hook up with them all the time! NASTY!

I mean, look, I admit that I have no self esteem, but I would hope, I would NEVER let a guy treat me like these women are treated, and they obviously have no self-esteem. But they put up with them and their cheating even though most are great looking women, who ARE the money makers too! I do not like to see women or this one guy treated these ways, but I like feel a NEED to see what happens. I have to see if ANY of them were ever sincere in wanting to change themselves, not just for their significant other, but for themselves. SO now you know my current shame. TOOL ACADEMY 3!! I know, I know. I will go stand in the corner.