Sunday, August 29, 2010

Pillsbury's Sweet Moments Giveaway

Thanks to MYBLOGSPARK, I got to try Pillsbury’s new Sweet Moments Bite-Size Brownies in Chocolate Fudge. Just like all of Pillsbury's products they were delicious. I look forward to trying the other Sweet Moments varieties.
Pillsbury introduces two new ways to enjoy life’s little luxuries with Sweet Moments Bite-Size and Molten Lava Brownies! Pillsbury Sweet Moments, now available in the refrigerated baked goods section of your local grocery store, are perfect for indulging any time of the day. Th
e Bite-Size Brownies, which are layered with either rich caramel or fudge and chocolaty coating, are just the right size to grab and go for a quick pick-me-up. They’re ready to eat, so are ready right when the craving strikes – no preparation necessary! And, at 60 calories per brownie, they’re just enough to satisfy your sweet tooth. And to reward yourself for a busy day well spent, try a Sweet Moments Molten Lava Brownie, which are served in single-serve bowls and are also available in rich caramel and fudge varieties. Each are covered in decadent chocolate or creamy caramel and topped with a chocolatey drizzle. After only 15 seconds in the microwave, the brownie bowls are warm and ready to enjoy. When chocolate bliss is this easy, how could you resist pausing for a Sweet Moment at the end of your day?
So in review there are bite size brownies in chocolate fudge and chocolate caramel and the molten lava brownies also come in chocolate fudge or chocolate caramel. Mmmm.

Thanks to MyBlogSpark, I received a
Sweet Moments Prize Pack which includes a VIP coupon for one of the new Pillsbury Sweet Moments and a chocolate spa kit.

1 lucky reader will win a Sweet Moments gift pack like the one I received.

To Win:

Leave a Comment about which of the new Pillsbury Sweet Moments desserts are you most excited to try...1 Entry

Tweet about this and Leave Proof...1 Entry

Follow My Blog...1 Entry

Add My Button to Your Page...2 Entries

BLOG About my Giveaway and Leave me the URL...5 Entries


Giveaway ends September 8th!!

*Disclaimer: I received a Sweet Moments gift pack in exchange for my honest opinions. The gift pack, information, and additional gift pack for giveaway were provided by Pillsbury and MyBlogSpark. I did not receive any monetary compensation. All opinions and thoughts expressed in this post are my own, and different people may have different outcomes.

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Thursday, August 26, 2010

The End of Miss Condescending

So...She didn't want to be emailed by ME again, like ever. Remember? So I made a comment as I told you all on her blog. Remember this "I said don't throw stones at glass houses. That she was the one who emailed ME. How would I know she was joking? She has no idea what my monetary situation is here and I thought she would be less judgemental. That I tried to show her I was worried about her and as an older person I do have more experience with bills. Why is that an insult?"

Just sheer facts. Don't throw stones. How would I know she was joking? She doesn't know my situation so she can't comment. I thought she was less judgemental. I was just worried for her. As an older person I have dealt with money issues longer. It is just facts, not insults. NONE.

She decided however not only could she have friends of hers comment insults to me on yesterdays post, but that SHE was allowed to email me. I can't email HER, but she is allowed to email ME. And what an email it was. As soon as I saw her name I knew I couldn't deal with it on my own, that I needed support. So I had my Mom stay and sit on the couch and read it out loud. I had no idea what to expect, but I was past the point where I was expecting anything good from her anymore. My expectations proved right.

She told me she couldn't believe I left that as a comment. That is was the SAME as an email. Which I found really interesting. She said no emails so I didn't email, nothing could make her happy. I think she actually wanted me to take her last email, insults and all and say nothing back. Just TAKE it. Well you know what, I have been TAKING it for my entire freaking life. That is one of the things I am encouraged by my family to do, STAND UP FOR YOURSELF Wendy. Do it. So I DID. I left a reasonable comment. I could have been snide and mean and called her out and named her, etc, but I am not like her, I can't be like that. So I just simply didn't take it, I talked back.

And what do I get? I am told by HER, I am condescending. That she does not need to be condescended to be ME. That while I am right and she doesn't know how I have money, I don't know how much money she has dealt with for the past 8 years (8 years. Wow. When I WAS her age.). How she deals with money from an inheritance and for lots of reasons. How her parents are accountants. How SHE knows about money. How she's been talked to about money and how to pay for bills all 24 years of her life (yeah I am so sure her parents took a 5 year old and did bills). How she doesn't like people telling her how to spend her money because she's already gotten it 400 times. (Sounds like other people have problem with her spending habits, not me) And nooooo, none of that was condescending at ALL. Mmmmm.

Oh but wait we are NOT done by a long shot. No you have to stay for the part where I started crying!. See I know, I know, I am overly sensitive lately because I am doing not so hot, but these statements are a little over the line I feel.

She tells ME not to contact HER again in ANY way. Not to read her blog. Then she told me to seek Professional Help. She crossed a line, and a big one at that. You want to turn a comment about putting the TV and internet you are whining about on a credit card into a huge fight, that is your odd choice. But to in any way, bring up my disorders and use them against me to inflict pain, etc, that is NOT okay. And NO, me being open about my disorders does not make them an open source for people to use to put me down. I shared because I am honest and because maybe it teaches people more about these disorders. No one has a right to use them to put me down to make themselves feel superior. Then she tells me if I leave a comment she will block my IP address, and she will be making all emails from me SPAM.

And then she tells me that next time someone sends me a lighthearted comment, which ACCORDING TO HER YOU CAN TELL BECAUSE IT ENDED WITH AN EXCLAMATION POINT!!!! Seriously, has anyone else ever heard of that?!! Of course you haven't because it isn't true! My Mother is a published author and she had never heard of such a thing! Anyway she tells me next time don't get offended and send the most condescending email I have ever read. SAY WHAT?! Because we are talking about the one that said I WAS responsible with money and try not to jump down people's throats because she said I was bringing America down, and that I am the one in her 30's, while she is in her early 20's so I have more experience with such monetary matters.I defended myself and it is true. I am older, she is younger. Deal with it lady!

That she said she's already spent enough time worrying if she's offending me too badly. But she won't be worrying anymore.It takes too much of her day and the emails have bothered her. That she doesn't need to be worrying if she's hurting my feelings. She has to worry about doing that with people in real life.

That last paragraph was kind of amusing actually after the crying paragraph. Because when had she worried about offending me? When had she stopped to think if she was hurting my feelings? Because I hadn't seen it once. She talks about condescending people being her pet peeve, but the only person who has been condescending is HER. So ironic. I wrote from my heart and I meant it each time. I was just being honest and factual. I am older. At 18 my grandfather died and for the first time I had a bunch of money and well things went not so great. We also sued MetLife at that time because we didn't GET the money he had set aside for my parents, so you learn a lot when you are suing Snoopy. I blew through have my inheritance and had to learn the very HARD way how to try and fix things. I took an accounting class. My Dad knows a lot about money and goes over it with us all the time, since I was about 11. I had a savings account. I have a checking account, multiple credit cards and the rest of that money in funds. If I use a real credit card I write a check out when I get home. Period. I don't care if her parents are accountants, she isn't. Even if she was, if she was still 24, I would say the same thing. I am 8 years older, I have dealt with it longer than you. It isn't an insult, just a fact.

I don't think she wanted things to get better between us. I think she needed someone to hate, so she had something to distract her and I was the unlucky one. Because I felt each of my emails back to her was showing and telling her, I care about you. I just wanted you to be happy. Don't you see that? And all that she took from it was insults which I don't understand how she found.

My Mother was not happy with the email. She said the girl was obviously unbalanced. I appreciated that, but the see professional help was haunting me. You can't say that to someone who has problems without it doing its' damage. Sandy showed up at one point and I asked if she had read yesterdays post yet and she said no. I told her the person I wrote about said I should seek help and she said some people just have opinions on your health, and I told her, no this wasn't an email looking out for me. I know the difference, I have gotten those. So I said I would send her the last email to so she could read it after the post. She reads all my posts.

After they all left, I was really upset. I was so upset I wanted to leave a rude remark on her blog under a different name so I was so not myself, I was creating a fake email when Sandy showed up and she was pissed off. I was caught in the act, she made me stop. She got it but she told me I wasn't (I know BABY sister) to ever go that girl's blog, comment on her, etc. And that she wanted me to block her if possible from my email and my blog. That she had written her an email telling her to stay away from me and my blog (awwww!), that she can't treat her sister like this. We tried to figure out how to block her for like 25 minutes but can't figure it out. Sandy then wanted to know how to delete comments. I knew I had 2 comments on yesterdays post, one supportive from Kristina and a rude one from Anonymous, either written BY her or one of her friends. I thought Sam wanted to delete that one. Only there were more comments I didn't know about. And Sandy didn't let me read them either. One LONG one by another anonymous, apparently I will lose a reader after all according to Sam, and one by her, herself. Sam wouldn't let me read it either. Sam left a comment for them, I doubt they bothered to read it, but it made me really proud to have her for a sister.

To have her defend me, it made me, well...yeah, it made me want to cry. You think your siblings can't stand you and then they defend you and say sweet thing about you that you didn't know they thought of you. I SO wish I knew what she emailed her. I don't think Sam will ever tell me though. My sister is a good sister, I have her at least, even though I don't have who was supposed to be my friend.

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Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Judged by the Non-Judgemental

I am really finding it hard to deal with anything right now. And just so you all know, NO I am not lying and the tragedy is actually about me. My Mom suggested that maybe someone thought that. It's not, just about someone very close and loved, so I can't seem to get past it and it has flared up all of my problems so much, that I am just crying all the time and having panic attacks over nothing. It hurts to breathe and the slightest thing can cause me to cry, even if it seems silly to others. So it is real late, no Kristina around to email and get a immediate response. But I can't stop myself so here goes my post. Somethings are just too much and I have been pushed too far and if I don't get these feelings out...I don't know, I just need them OUT. NOW.

So I was surprised to see an email from someone I considered a blogger friend in my inbox. She was one of the few I had still been commenting on lately, because I knew she was starting somewhere new. I felt lost and didn't want that for her too. It is hard to feel so alone. I wasn't expecting an email that was biting and it took me off guard and yeah, made me cry. I had made an offhand remark to her about money, basically because I care and don't want her to be lonely. I was shocked and hurt when I got the short email and sent one of my own saying how I WAS responsible and try not to jump down people's throats, and that I am the one in her 30's, while she is in her early 20's so I have more experience with such matters. I think that makes total sense don't you think, almost 10 years on someone GIVES you more experience. I wanted this over, I can't DEAL with this conflict, but instead of being the easy going person I thought she was, she thanked me for putting HER down because of her age and she hadn't known I saw her that way.

Which killed me! I never said that, in NO way could you take that in context even, from my short to the point email. So I gave in and emailed back again, struggling to hold it together, even though this is KILLING me. Because it IS, having to deal with this on top of that fact that all I really want to do is go to sleep and never wake up? Yeah I KNOW it is an unhealthy feeling but I am struggling right now. Maybe if she was reading me still she'd know that and be giving me a freaking break. Anyway, I write to her that I have always thought her more of an equal, that she has an old soul. That I felt like her initial comments were putting ME down because of the fact that I live at home and have mental disorders. And that hurt and isn't fair because I have been in charge of my money since I was 18. And that I was just trying to find a way she could be happy in her new place.

Well I would think you could find nothing insulting in that. I would think you could only find that complimentary and be shown, wow, somewhere cares about me. But I am wrong. She pounced on everything that didn't make sense, to her. HOW was she insulting me? Of course I could be insulting her but it only works one way apparently. Telling me I am why America is in a crisis is so not an insult. And that it was RUDE of me to suggest that because of my AGE, I deal with money more often. Have I seen how many expensive items she has bought over the years? She spends money all the time.

Yeah I LOVED that part. Rude of me. PLEASE people can someone explain to me how a simple FACT of nature is rude? I am 8-9 years older than this woman. So when I started making money babysitting, she was still IN diapers. When I was left the inheritance from my grandfather at 18, which I made all sorts of mistakes with and learned a LOT of lessons with, she was maybe 10 years old. So I am pretty FREAKING sure, I have been dealing with money longer than she has. And due to that inheritance and the mistakes I made I have spent plenty of money. And I to this day stimulate the economy though I admit I spend it on smarter things than others. So how is it rude to say I, because of my advanced years, deal with money more? And you know what else? I also do the grocery shopping and errand shopping for this household, so I have to stick to a budget for FIVE people, not one single person. TRY THAT.

So I still wanted this to be okay though. I know, some of you would be why Wendy, but I don't like to fight with people I thought were my friends, I thought I knew. So I tried again. I told her it felt like she was chastising me like I was a child, because of my disorders. And that I know how expensive items are but that I also know how lonely it must be moving to a new place and I wanted her to be as comfortable as possible. And that it isn't rude, because when I WAS 18, she was maybe 10. That I am older and have had to deal with it longer. THAT IS ALL. That I thought she got that I don't go around insulting people and HOW would I know it was a joke? It broke my heart.

I thought it would finally get through to her that I never insulted HER. That whatever was bothering her she would stop taking out on ME. That she would email back and it would finally be okay. Like I needed it to be. Was praying for it to be. But of course me prayers aren't exactly being answered lately. She wrote back. To tell me her comments never suggested my disorders or living at home made "me a silly child". Yeah loved that line, that was all her, guess what it made me feel since I never called myself that? See she is allowed to read between the lines and find things that weren't there, but it is illegal for me, even though I think by that statement we see she does think low of me. She told ME not to email HER.

Yeah I loved that one too. Because SHE started THIS. See, she doesn't like people being condescending, it's a pet peeve. Ironic, considering that is all she has done to me since she first emailed. See when you email or text someone and you want them to know it's a joke, you add LOL, or J/K, or something so they know you didn't just slap them across the face. She never bothered. And apparently this silly child assumed wrong when she though talking to her would get things worked out so they could remain friends. I don't like fake people. And I guess she is fake because she is not who she pretended to be. Some nice, non-judgemental, free-spirited, funny person. Silly child? You have no idea what I have been through in my life, what I have had to endure, what I have to wake up knowing for the rest of my freaking life. Don't YOU call me a silly child. You have NO idea how long I have had to be an adult. WAY longer than is fair.

And then she ended her last email with, can you guess it? Yes you may be older but I live on my own. I have a full-time job. I deal with more money than you do (um does she know what is in my checking or in my mutual funds?!). I am incredibly smart about my money (I could say things here) I don't need you to tell me how to spend it (evil Wen suggesting you buy that TV). I dislike getting advice from people when it's not asked for.

Yeah she actually ended it with that line. She wrote a POST complaining about her situation and I made a ONE line comment at like 4 in the morning one day supporting HER blog though she doesn't bother to comment on here anymore, and she manages t0 put me down 4 days in a row. And I kept waiting and waiting for her emails, hoping it was finally going to be the one where she was back to the girl I KNEW and she was going to be herself and sorry for being PMS-ing or whatever and that she appreciated my wanting her just to be happy. Because I told her time and time again that is all I wanted. Why isn't that enough for her? I would love for people to tell me they want me to be happy and she just is spitting on it, twisting it and making it ugly and I can't understand that.

Happiness feels so unattainable to me, so why would someone who is being wished it repeatedly, throwing it back in your face? I went to her blog and posted since no emails. I said don't throw stones at glass houses. That she was the one who emailed ME. How would I know she was joking? She has no idea what my monetary situation is here and I thought she would be less judgemental. That I tried to show her I was worried about her and as an older person I do have more experience with bills. Why is that an insult?

And that is that. Knowing her sway, if she chooses to go public and badmouth me outright I could lose most of you. I am not sure if I would be surprised because I thought I knew her. I really did. But obviously I don't. There were some traits she has that made me think if I needed to, I might be able to talk to her about deep stuff. I guess it is a good thing I never acted on that. I could probably name her as she goes by on here, but that's not me. I needed to vent my hurt, is all. I can't take anymore see, and I feel like I am barely hanging on. I am so very tired.

WHY now? I just do not get it. I have been following her and commenting for almost 2 years, so why did she have to pick NOW to pick one simple sentence and implode against me? At a point where I NEED friends, not need to lose them or need to battle them. Why?

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Tuesday, August 24, 2010


No matter how hard I try

I always end up facing the darkness once again

I beg the Heavens for sweet release from this torture

But no prayers seem to work, it is my destiny to live in this bleakness

I fall to the ground begging to be set free from this agony

To be given a new chance in life, a new road to travel

But I am just looked down at with pity at my weakness

I am supposed to have the strength of will to perservere.

I cry my tears, feeling so alone, so mocked at my weakness

Knowing I am failing at my personal tests that I am meant to pass

I pound the ground until my fists are bloody because I am too fragile

My heart broke long ago, leaking my inner strength slowly away

I cry out asking for help, begging for a helping hand

Knowing I can't do this on my own, knowing I will fail alone

I bury my face in the dirt and debris, uncaring, choking as I gasp for help

Please don't leave me alone in this, I can't do this, I lost the strength long ago

Something always pushes me back into the darkness

Please don't leave me there alone this time

Please reach down and take my hand

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Friday, August 20, 2010

Losing It

Sorry Guys. I have been reading and doing some commenting, but as for me myself writing...well the post I left the other day still stands.

And it isn't getting any better or any easier. I continue to feel like I am going to throw up at the influx of emotions I feel. Odd how a tragic event can be that bat that breaks your knees, day after day after day. I wish I could be like other members of my family and put it in a box while they deal with their everyday lives, but that's not me sadly. I just am unable to compartmentalize like they can. It pops up in my mind all the time, so much so that I am having panic attacks all the time. If I think about it or the people, I most likely start sobbing. It weighs so heavy on my heart that it hurts and is so hard to breathe.

I know I am being vague with what this tragedy is, but this isn't something I would talk about on the blog. Not unless the involved party wanted it talked about for some reason you know? Which wouldn't happen for a LONG, LONG time if ever. Plus not all are aware yet of anything being...different.

I kind of wish I was like those people. Ignorance is bliss. But I know I would know eventually, it is just a fact. It would have been said, maybe even casually right in front of me and I would have freaked out and it would be old news but not to me. So I would have known eventually, I guess I just wish I could have hung onto to the innocence of not knowing what I know now, for just a little longer. Because once you know something, there is no taking it back. I mean seriously, think about it. You can't go up to a person and say their parent is dying and then take it back. They now know the truth and have to live with that until their parent is gone for good. Once the truth is out there, especially when it's not something good, it is out their forever. There is no forgetting it or checking it off and going on, bad news is there to stay.

It kind of made me wish I was a kid again. So that not only was I unaware of anything bad, but I wasn't going to be told of anything bad. Kids have it nice after all. The bad stuff is kept from them. Secrets they won't learn until much later in life.

I wish I was a kid again. Maybe the emotions would leave me be, so I could stop crying all the time. Maybe I wouldn't read the title of one of my blog friends posts and want to rip her a new one because it hit a little too close. Maybe I could get through the day without someone looking at me and asking "Are you alright?".

"No. I am far from alright. Something bad happened...not even to me, but I am freaking out and losing it."

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Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Review of 100 Prayers God Loves to Hear, 100 Praise Songs By Stephen Elkins

Thanks to, I got to review a copy of Stephen Elkin's "100 Prayers God Loves to Hear, 100 Praise Songs".

This is a children's religious song book that includes 2 cd's with all the songs sung. Essentially each song is supposed to teach children how to pray about certain things. This is not your traditional christian song book though, it covers a great deal. You have prayers from Mother Theresa to Martin Luther, etc.

This is definitely for younger children, perfect for short attention spans. It has treasured older songs like Amazing Grace and newer songs I had never heard of before in my life.

I am not sure I would use it if I had children as I AM Christian, but it is a cute book and cd duo, very colorful and seems like kids should like it indeed.

(Thanks to Thomas Nelson Publishers for sending me a copy to review.)

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Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Naive is Safer

Anyone heard of MSO Marketing? They want me to put up links for retailers and I was going to email them back and ask what was in this for me, but my sister made me think they were a scam so now I thought I would ask if other people had heard of them, their website looks legit....

Anyway I am not really up to talking. I didn't think things could feel any worse, or get any darker. Then life throws something at you that makes you feel like someone took a bat to your knees and makes you feel like you could throw up from all the myriad of emotions you are feeling.

I know I AM naive, because I will never understand the How's and Why's. It's like they are beyond me. I don't think I want to either. I'd rather stay curled up in my Naive Blanket, thinking good wins out over evil...even if I am fooling myself, it makes me feel safer.

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Saturday, August 14, 2010

Hodge Podge

Well, first, thanks for those who took the time to comment on yesterdays post. I am in a really dark place and your comments bring some light to the blackness. For my newer readers, yes I have depression, a few anxiety disorders, OCD and BiPolar Type II. (Oh and I am a Diabetic, have migraines, scholiosis, arthritis, a fast heart rate, an extra heart beat, I take Celexa, Xanax and just started Topamax and Lithium. I also take a heart medication and Ambien to sleep otherwise I would never fall asleep, I am just so anxious all the time. So yeah I am definitely not in a hill right now, I am in a valley, a deep scary one that cuts at my hands when I try to crawl out. What? I fancy myself a writer sometimes, I like to get descriptive.

Okay, onto something else. I caught up on all the episodes of LA Ink. Man I LOVE Kat!

I also love Dan, he is super cool and supportive, which is exactly what she needs, which she has in Adrienne too. Corey though...I don't know. He was a real jerk to her, and he could have handled things so much better. So you want to be closer to home, so TALK to Kat, don't alienate her and then quit on her like he did. Now he wants back like he didn't break her heart?! Pshhhh!! Make his WORK for it Kat Von D!!!

And I finally got to watch all the finale parts for SYTYCD! I am proud of my baby girl Lauren. I am. I got to the point like the judges, where I would have been happy if either 3 had won. But I am so sad for my baby boys Kent and Robert! They so deserved it too, and they must be just devestated. Happy as can be for Lauren, because those guys LOVED eachother, but still sad because they were SO close. And that makes me so sad for them!

They are going on tour at least, they are actually going to be at either the Mohegan Sun or Foxwoods Resort in September here in CT. I wish I had the money and the guts to go see them, that would be so amazing to get a chance to maybe meet them.

A few of the dances from Part 1 of the finale were just amazing also, so I had to post one with each finalist for you all to enjoy.

Kent Boyd & Allison Holker

Lauren Froderman & Robert Roldan (second and third finalists)

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Friday, August 13, 2010

Depression Regression

I thought about not writing about how I was really feeling. That I could lose reader or followers, etc. And then my Mom told me if someone stopped reading me because I wrote about how I am feeling then they are not worth having as a reader. And I think she is right. Besides I made a vow to be honest on my blog, and how I am feeling is as honest as it can get.

I'm really not doing well at all. I know it is redundant, but I feel so lonely and alone. I have my family, of course. But I don't really have anyone else. My friend H is just not being there for me, no matter how much I tell her I need my friend right now. N lives in Mass. and we just never seem to connect when she is here, and W is a new Mom, so it's understandable that it is baby world 24/7. And I just have never felt too comfortable talking depression with the last two, they have never had it, and not like I do. So it can feel so awkward.

So it feels like I have no where to turn to, besides my Mom, lately. It gives me a feeling of such isolation, which terrifies me. I get this feeling where I feel like a camera is going around me in a 360 degree angle and I am alone, no one there to help me, and it panics me. What do I do if I lose it completely and there is no one there but me? I am NOT an optimistic person, I see myself withering up and disappearing. Or dying.
It's starting to feel like there is a distance growing between me and the things that make me feel secure. Like I am in the center and the things that have been known to help me: my Mom, Maxie, certain Imagery Scenarios, the Fam, music, etc. are all like 10 feet away from me in a circular pattern, so they are all at the same distance. They never were that far away before. And when I make a step towards one, they get further away, which only further frustrates me until I am running after them in tears....yeah.
Some of my family are saying they see good things from these new meds I am on. Which is nice...if true. I don't see it, and right now I don't care because I feel out of control, I feel like I am sitting in the dark, in a corner, trying to curl into as small a ball as possible. Because it hurts to be seen, because if someone can see me, then they can see my pain, and that thought it scary as all get out.

When I didn't know what depression was, I didn't understand what could be as big a deal as people sad. I got it was not good, because I saw it made my Mom and my little sister cry, a LOT, but I didn't get why. Then I was 18 and it slowly started invading me, and 14 years later, you would think I would understand it better, but I don't. I understand how it feels now, but I don't get it any better than I did before I ever had it. All I know is that it hurts, like a painful weapon, and I can cry like someone died, and sometimes I wonder if that is because someone

I am not even sure I know who Wendy M_____ would have been or turned out to be, if things had turned out a little different and I never got depressed. If I never got all the other disorders, and the OCD and then the BiPolar II. Who would I be?

Instead of this screwed up version of Wendy who cries all the time, can't hold a job because she is so messed up and can't even do the online schooling yet because she can't stop crying right now? I am just so unhappy and scared and tired of feeling like such a failure. Katie should get her test results tomorrow, Sam might have a job by LITTLE sisters. And I have nothing, I do the groceries and run errands, ohhhhh. I am such a loser and such a failure, not what my parents deserved.

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Thursday, August 12, 2010

I am just SO exciting

Well let's see, right now I am watching Dog the Bounty Hunter because I find it fascinating now for some reason. I even looked up Dog's family. He has 11 children (unless he doesn't acknowledge ones not from his marriages) from his 5 wives. Only one wife gave him no children. One child died as a baby. One daughter Barbara Katy, died the day before his wedding to current wife Beth. She was the first child to receive a bounty hunter's badge, posthumously, when Dog placed it in her coffin. Aww!

His first wife gave him Duane and Leland, the two sons you see on the show regularly. His second wife, I think may be Mormon, because his son Wesley is Mormon. J.R. is his brother and Zebediah was the child that died. His third wife Lyssa gave his the now deceased Barbara Katy, Nicholas and Baby Lyssa, who is also a bounty hunter on the show. Beth used to hold the record as having been the youngest woman getting her bounty hunter license at 25, but Lyssa got hers at 19! Yeah I know a lot, I know. The fourth wife gave no children, but was the one who convinced Dog to move to Hawaii. She also helped bounty hunt and raise 6 of his children and one of her own. His current wife Beth gave him two children, Bonnie and Garry. They also adopted one of Dog'g grandchildren(Barbara's son).

Just from the 3 siblings on the show, Dog has 6 granchildren so far. That leaves 4 children who could have who knows how many kids, especially who 2 being Mormon, LOL!!!

Oh and then....ohhhh exciting, I taped 8 hours of my BRAND new obsession! LA Ink!! I know I am just blowing your minds with my excitingness!!

And then if I have time? So You Think You Can Dance!!!

I know you are clutching your hearts with the daringness of it all! I am so exciting, especially this summer!

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Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Movie Tuesday

Well I was able to get Fragile with Calista Flockhart, but the haunted house one was all out, they only had like 5 copies. BOO. Especially since the worker chick said I should check it out, because it was really good and that these two were the only worthwhile ones!! AHA!! SEE I KNOW what I'M talking about!!

I also rented Death at a Funeral, The Stranger (with Stone Cold Steve Austen...I just like saying that), Under the Mountain, The Joneses and The Visitor.

I am sure you have all seen commercials for Death at a Funeral and it could be as LAME as I thought it would be, which is why I got that one from Redbox! Martin Laurence, Chris Rock, Tracy Morgan, etc.

The Stranger is "Pro wrestling legend Steve Austin stars as a man with no name, no memory and absolutely nothing left to lose. But when he finds himself hunted by both the FBI and the Russian mob, this amnesiac decides to fight back. Pursuit cannot stop him. Torture will not break him. And with every beating, bullet and betrayal, he'll remember another piece of the horror that took away his career, his family and his identity."

Erica Cerra is in this and I LOVE her! She plays Jo Lupo on Eureka ans is AWESOME!!

Under the Mountain looks really cute! It is about teenage twins who battle dark forces hidden beneath Auckland's volcanoes. It's got Sam Neill so I am hopeful it will rock.

The Joneses stars Demi Moore and David Duchovny. "Perfect couple Steve and Kate Jones, and their gorgeous teen-aged children Jenn and Mick, are the envy of their posh, suburban neighborhood filled with McMansions and all the trappings of the upper middle class. Kate is the ultimate trend setter - beautiful, sexy, dressed head-to-toe in designer labels. Steve is the admired successful businessman who has it all: a gorgeous wife, big house and an endless supply of high-tech toys. Jenn and Mick rule their new school as they embody all that is hip and trendy - cool clothes, fast cars and the latest gadgets. But as the neighbors try to keep up with the Joneses, none are prepared for the truth about this all- too perfect family."

The Visitor looks really amazing! I saw a trailer for it before a movie the other day and NEEDED to see it. "In Connecticut, the widower and lonely Professor Walter Vale has a boring life. He teaches only one class at the local college and is trying to learn how to play the piano, despite not having the necessary musical talent. Walter is assigned to attend a conference about Global Policy and Development at the New York University, where he is to give a lecture about a paper that he is coauthor on. When he arrives at his apartment in New York, he finds Tarek Khalil, a syrian musician, and Zainab, a Senegalese street vendor living there. He sympathizes with the situation of the illegal immigrants and invites the couple to stay with him. Tarek invites him to go to his gig in the Jules Live Jazz and Walter is fascinated with his African drum. Tarek offers to teach Walter to play the drum. However, after an incident in the subway, Tarek is arrested by the police and sent to a detention center of immigrants. Walter hires a lawyer to defend Tarek and out of the blue, Tarek's mother Mouna appears at Walter's apartment from Michigan. He invites her to stay in Tarek's room and while trying to release Tarek, Walter and Mouna get close to each other and he finds a reason to live an exciting life again."

Watching Death at a Funeral and The Stranger tonight. They have to go back tomorrow so they are the obvious choices!

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Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Even I Have My Limits and the Why's

Well it is official. Fangoria's Frightfest 8 movies get out today. But even I have my limitations and standards people. I have watched the trailers for all 8 movies. And this is ME, the ultimate Horror fan. Ummm.....

There are only TWO of the 8 movies that I want or am even willing to see. One is Dark House. A house that was an orphanage where there was a massacre. These guys decide to build the ultimate haunted house with amazing holographic imagery and actors, only it ends up this place really is haunted and the spirits are pretty pissed off and death, gruesome naturally, begins. The other is Fragile and stars Calista Flockhart. She joins a special hospital suddenly, and they only have 8 children left. One child Maggie, seems to be haunted by a girl they think she has made up. Only soon a secret seems to have been unleashed and they are all being punished for what happened to this other little girl. Normal horror movie concepts right?

WHY won't I see the other 6 movies you ask?

1) Cannibalism is so not my thing. There is a reason I stay away from movies like The Hills Have Eyes, etc. Why would I want to see people forced into the practice?!! 2) A guy who falls so in lust with the woman who is not his fiance he helps her keep on attaining eternal life by taking others lives...and Wes Bentley just creeps me out in general. 3) A woman who becomes obsessed with a man who finds his people to kill and eat online? Yeah, NO, disgusting and the fact that it was based on real events disturbs the crap out of me. 4) A movie where some fools go to hunt a 3,000 pound boar and end up getting hunted themselves by the locals and the wild basically kind of like cannibalism!! EW! 5) A woman who loses her baby and goes away to this house (where horrible thing happened to kids...yeah WHY go there, probably weren't told) to heal but can't figure out if she is being haunted or going crazy from grief. I just am not comfortable with the whole setup, I think it is tactless. 6) A semi-truck in the outback is slaughtering people, with all sorts of ways...there is NO help IN the OUTBACK people. And it just looks really, extremely gorey. There's things in the back of the truck people!! It's called Road Kill!! And I LIKED The Hitcher! But this looks like I would throw up! *shudders*

So those are the reasons I won't be watching the other 6 movies. Shame they had to ruin so many of them with cannibalism, I find that disgusting and a concept I am not willing to even deal with. I also don't like mutated inbreds, another reason I don't watch things like The Hills Have Eyes, etc.

Even this horror buff has her standards and limitations.

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Monday, August 9, 2010

Walmart Box Top Winner!!!

The Winner of the Walmart Gift Card thanks to Walmart and Box Tops on participating General Mills products IS.......

Courtney from New Hampshire (!!!

Send me your info so I can send it off to the people at Blogspark!!
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Sunday, August 8, 2010

TLC Rant

I am sorry I know I mentioned it briefly on Facebook but the train wreck on TLC that is DC Cupcakes, while true, like a car wreck you just have to watch, it is still a WRECK!! It is SO obviously scripted first off! I mean PLEASE, like you couldn't tell the guy was going to be horrible at icing the cupcakes, so that the last girl was going to HAVE to be the one who was good at icing cupcakes, etc, etc!! Even the way they talk sometimes, it's like, is the camera guy holding cue cards so you have a general idea of what you are supposed to do next?! Because we ALL knew the lady was gonna be pissed off when you chose the lighter color in her swatch, so you had to do them all over again! OY!

And then how annoying Sophie especially is, aghhhhhh!!! She has two annoying sides! The sickeningly annoying chipper and peppy side, and then when you cross her, there is the evil angry as a devil side! Katherine is slightly toned down compared to her sister anyway, but she will jump on that peppy bandwagon too, and it's like, STOP, real people don't act like that!!

REAL reality cooking shows that are entertaining and about baking are Ace of Cakes and Cake Boss. They have large orders each week for specialty cakes or orders, and the cameras follow them around, as they have fun, fights, fires, etc. REAL unplanned fires. Not have the lady walk away to chat on her phone so the ganache catches on fire which was SO obvious. UGH! Duff really has decorators who have the walls crumble down on them. Buddy really has idiot cousins burn the cakes so they have to start all over again, it isn't all preplanned NONSENSE! I enjoy the spontaneity of it, the REALNESS of it. It's like the cooking competitions, seeing disasters happen is part of real life, so seeing how Duff or Buddy and their teams deal with those disasters is part of the entertainment.

But Katherine and Sophie's "so-called near disasters" that never quite happen gosh gee willikers thank our lucky stars, is just so not working. It leaves a nasty taste in your mouth. Everything ALWAYS works out! They even happen to just have a artist friend at home who can run right over and help them build a wire felt like Peewee's Playhouse!!! Seriously it was like who is our guest for this week? What are we going to learn to make this week? So stupid! Really if you have watched it, they have a "guest" every week, besides maybe a special guest artist! The firefighters, the roller derby girls, the Greeks, the Dog People, etc. Instead of the mailman showing up at Peewee's door, it is a different charity showing up at Katherine and Sophie's Bakery "Lab" door every week. *gags*

Whereas the other guys have multiple clients they are delivering to so it doesn't feel like a children's show! I love me some Duff♥ and Buddy. Duff most of all, I would die to get to spend time at Charm City Cakes, their cakes are ART.

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Thursday, August 5, 2010


Adechike is finally GONE!!! I was on pins and needles, worried it could be Robert that went, but thankfully, finally Adechike was finally recognized as being the LEAST talented by America! It just took THEM 7 weeks, but he is finally gone so I will try to make do with that knowledge.

I think Wednesday's performances just showcased that Adechike had to go. Robert did great overall and his Viennese Waltz was actually pretty and not boring like I find waltz's normally. Lauren's duet with Ade was just on fire! And Kent's performance with Neil was just...breathtaking. I will post all three of these routines here so if you missed them you can enjoy them.

The three best people (non-injured) made it to the final three in my opinion. Kent, Lauren and Robert. I do think Kent should win, but at the same time, if any three won, I would be happy for them. I have a feeling all three will find work and quickly!




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Wednesday, August 4, 2010


She read it AND caught me while I was in an Ambien stupor!! I was asleep on the couch, as I fall asleep there every night. I had just awoken and was getting a drink from the fridge when I hear "Makeup Nazi hmm?!!", and my heart sank. So what did my sharp as a downy pillow mind think of? "Heheeheeeheeeheeeaaahaahaaaheeeeeeeeeeeeee" and close. Yeah my rebuttle skills when I am half asleep are STELLAR. I thought the whole conversation, as it was, WAS HILARIOUS!

And Katie wanted to know what the reference to "Makeup Nazi" was and Sandy explained, which had me laughing inside until I felt dizzy! Man, I need to get a clue when I am tired, that my perception of things is SKEWED!

Went to Macy's and bought the Clinique Pore Minimizer Instant Perfector in very light, and also picked up the Nuetrogena 3-in-1 Concealer for Eyes.

These two ended up costing me more than I thought, so that eyeliner is going to have to wait sadly enough. I will have to use the cheap $1.99 Rimmel stuff I have from Florida. Which is a pain because it is water-proof so I will have to use eye make-up remover every time I use it. Grrrr.

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Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Grave Mistake

I made a grave error people. I went through ALL the makeup I front of my sister Sandy. Who I now think I will partly refer to, just in my head, as the makeup Nazi. It was such a MISTAKE!! She threw away hundreds of dollars of MY makeup!! She started just laying up on her bed, then she was like "haven't you had that for like 2 years?!!" and ended up beside me, making ma hand her ever single piece of make-up for her to inspect and smell.

One of the resons being apparently I have no nose...holes? Ducts? Whatever, I seem to have no sense of smell unless they really stank, because things smelled fine to me and then Sandy would smell them and look horrified that I had been putting that near my eyeball or on my lips. And when she saw that some stuff had expiration dates, ooohhh boy. Some of them she agreed did not smell or look wrong at all so "for now" she is "letting" me keep them. Yeah my baby sister is letting me keep the makeup I spent money on. She tore a Clinique item I use all the time from my very hands and my favorite under eye concealer!! *sob* She says if I can afford to buy all these shows soon on dvd I can afford to get new stuff of that!! WHAT?!! I am saving for those dvd series!!!

Remember my lip gloss collection, it was all over the place and included this which was totally FULL of my collection of glosses?

Yeah it has a couple in each level rolling around because it is THAT empty!! *sobbing openly* They all smelled fine to me! Some even smelled FRUITY, but Sandy, makeup Nazi, said they were "off" and they went into the garbage bag.

At one point I managed to sneak my favorite eyeliner out of the bag. It was ONE thing, and it is my most favorite eyeliner and I have never had trouble. And she didn't notice for quite a bit...I was in her room though, and she discovered it and realized it was one she had discarded, she what did she do you ask? She BROKE it right in front of me so it was unusable!! SO mean!! And then she moved the bag so I couldn't reach it anymore!!

Oh man and when I opened the last holder of makeup...oh dear. I knew I was going to be in trouble when she saw what was in one of those drawers. See I had really liked these cream shadows by Revlon and had bought a BUNCH of them and they were like 10 bucks a pop. And they did not smell I swear! I believe. Yes it is true, they were at least 10 years old...she hit me!! She had called up the rules on the laptop earlier about how long makeup is good for, but do those people think we are rich?!! Like I can afford to buy my mascaras every 3 months!! I am not made of money!

So she ended up getting rid of about HALF of my makeup collection, which is a LOT. It filled like a CVS/Walmart bag and weighed a ton! She has NO mercy!

Now just to get the blemish concealer, under eye concealer and eyeliner, I have to spend over 40 dollars!!! That is INSANITY!! Thank you for listening to my rant.

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Sunday, August 1, 2010

Walmart Box Tops for Education Review and Giveaway!!!

The Box Tops for Education program is an easy solution and this year Walmart is making it even easier! From Aug. 3 - Aug. 31, head over to your local Walmart to find 4 Box Tops on participating General Mills products and earn more cash for the participating school of your choice. As your one-stop destination for all your needs this back-to-school season, Walmart is helping you save more and earn more with the Box Tops for Education brands you love.

With over 20 great brands and more than 40 products participating, here are just a few favorites that include 4 Box Tops that you can find at Walmart this August: Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal, Pillsbury Toaster Strudel pastries, Trix Yogurt, Hamburger Helper skillet meals, Totino’s Pizza Rolls snacks, Nature Valley Granola Bars and Betty Crocker Fruit Roll-Ups snacks. Be sure to keep an eye out for Box Tops on great products from Kleenex, Ziploc, and Hefty too!

I got Juicy Juice, Lucky Charms, some Pizza Rolls and some Betty Crocker Cake mixes. Wonderful to shop and know it is going to be FREE!!

I was provided with a $25 Walmart gift card to use to purchase my favorite participating Box Tops items.

They also are to provide me with an additional gift card to give away to one of me readers!!!

To Win:

Leave a Comment about the must-have item that they’ll be purchasing from Walmart this back-to-school season...1 Entry

Tweet about this and Leave Proof...1 Entry

Follow My Blog...1 Entry

Add My Button to Your Page...2 Entries

BLOG About my Giveaway and Leave me the URL...5 Entries


Giveaway ends Sunday, August 8th!!

The gift card, information, and giveaway were all given to me by General Mills through MyBlogSpark.

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