You KNOW You are Mormon IF...

This is the REAL version, Kristina P. was all about Utah Mormons. This is for all us regular Mormon folks...and if you are not Mormon but this screams you, maybe it's time to convert! ;P

You Know You're Mormon If...

-its not "the early bird catches the worm" its, "the seminary student gets into college"

-you say "provo", "salt lake", or "palmyra" without the state and automatically assume that the whole world knows where those places are

-there is a son on a mission and mom is pregnant with another.

-you know what a "fireside" is

-You go to a church potluck and there is every type of jello imaginable

-8 kids in a family is "average"

-your 14th and 16th birthdays are the best birthdays of your life

-you think "heck" is the place for people who do not believe in "gosh"

-you know how to pronounce and spell Mahonri Moriancumer

-you know what ZL, DL, AP, PPI, BYC, SYC, YSA, GA, EQP, EFY, YC, CTR, and BYU all stand for

-Modest is Hottest

-Youth Conference, EFY, and Girls Camp are the best 3 weeks of the year!

-mormon movies are amazing and Kirby Heyborne is your hero ( he is my Mormon Crush!)

-you drive into the church parking lot and at least half the lot is filled with 12 passenger vans

-you "Bless this food to nourish and strengthen" your body before eating doughnuts

-going 24 hours without eating is no longer a challenging thing

-a "Caffeine High" is eating a king size chocolate bar

-"How many wives does your dad have?" is often the first question asked when someone finds out that you're mormon

-parents are disappointed if their kid "only" got into Harvard

-buying a prom dress is the most difficult thing of your life

-writing in your journal is a daily event (well this one was NOT me)

-"I can't...I'm Mormon" has been an excuse on more than one occasion

-your mom is pregnant at the same time you are

-you have 3 or more BYU sweatshirts/shirts

-John Bytheway is your favorite comedian

-a keg party consists of rootbeer

-BYU has been you're dream school since you were 5

-you either live in, have many friends from, or are from Utah

-being a "rebel" is drinking Mountain Dew more than twice in one week

-you consider a great date watching The Princess Bride!

- The laying on of hands has nothing to do with physical violence.

- Your hobby is work for the dead.

-you've ever pushed 120mph in a 55mph zone on the way to a church dance

- You've ever had your alarm set for 4:45 am

- Your first date was when you were 16 to a Church Dance and your parent was a chaperone.

-all your dishes have your name written on them with masking tape

-you think Jell-O is one of the basic food groups

-at least one of your salad bowls is at a neighbor's house

-you have never arrived at a meeting on time

-you have more wheat stored in your basement than most third world countries

-you've already got your order in for volume 50 of "The Work and The Glory"

-you have to guess more than five times the name of the child you're disciplining

-you automatically assume that BYOB means, Bring Your Own Burgers

-you arrive to an activity an hour late and are the first person there

-"Oh my Heck!" is your idea of swearing

-before "The Discussion" in fifth grade you think people get pregnant by praying for babies

-You say "the scriptures" instead of "the bible" and people are confused

-You knew how to iron your own white shirts/dresses before you were ten

-The best present on your eighth birthday is a set of scriptures with your name EMBOSSED on the front cover

-You are the only person in your high school's theatre department who knows how to tie a necktie . . . and have to do so for every guy wearing one on stage . . . and you're a girl

-An evening's hi-jinks involve "heart attacks" or "forking"

-You go to college and only know how to cook dishes in amounts of seven portions or more

-You think that spending more than three hours at church on Sunday is normal

-You know exactly what Beehives, Mia Maids, and Laurels are, and have to explain what those are to your friends

-you think the only sensible way to buy groceries is in bulk

-You know how to make brownies/cookies/frosting/muffins/p

ancakes/waffles from scratch

-You know what "from scratch" means

-You have more than one religious picture/statue in your home including in your bathroom and the rooms of you and your siblings

-You think that sharing your dorm room with only ONE roommate is a luxurious arrangement

-You think it's rude to call or come to someone's home unannounced on Monday night

-You know that the "golden dude" on top of the temple is NOT doing a karate kick, but is holding a trumpet

-You think foreign language class in high school is good practice for your mission

-You plan on spending your retirement years on missions

-Your favorite lunch hang-out is the Seminary building

-Your life is not complete without 1) passing off all six years of Girl's Camp 2)Earning your Young Womanhood Recognition award 3) Graduating Seminary 4)Graduating Institute and 5) Getting married in your favorite temple (ummm did NOT do all these...awww so sad.LOL)

-you get these jokes