Thank You Michael Buble

Just a lazy Sunday. We had BLT's for dinner and watched Up. I love that movie, it is so cute! Dug is awesome, but it is Karl that is just the cutest curmudgeon ever!! I love when Disney and Pixar team up, it is pure magic as Disney always is.

Everything is fine with my friend. I made myself worry for nothing, as she made me feel like I was crazy to have worried that my sharing with her would make her not want to be friends, so yay, one thing has worked out for me lately.

Guess what?!! In about 6 hours I can take off the monitor and electrodes FOR GOOD!! I am so excited, but oddly enough, I am wondering how I am going to feel being free again. I have actually gotten used to all this, it is part of my routine, so it will be like...Oh crap I forgot my monitor...oh wait I don't need it anymore. But I WANT to be free! To walk around and not need to be wearing something that will hold the monitor will be so great! To not roll over it as I sleep...man that will be sweet! I am now just very anxious to know WHEN the results will be in, and what they will mean for me. Hurry up docs!

I am posting the music video LOST by Michael Buble. It just feels like he knows my thoughts and feelings and wrote a song about them. Like he is singing directly to me. Yeah maybe I am a nerd, but it is me being honest. I want to know that I am not alone. That even when I AM lost, someone is beside me while I am lost. This song has always just felt like Michael Buble GETS it. He understands being in the dark place, feeling like you are so very alone and like there is nothing left for you to give, so all you want is to give up. He also seems to get that we need to feel like we are not all alone, even if we can't really let ourselves believe that. This song is just one that I sometimes play over and over, again and again, because while it strikes the nerve of how I feel, it makes me feel hope that there ARE people who understand, and don't mock feeling like this. So many people think these feelings just go away, and for a lot of lucky people they do. But for some of us, these are feelings and emotions we will never escape. Thank you Buble.

And here are the lyrics:

I can't believe it's over
I watched the whole thing fall
And I never saw the writing that was on the wall
If I'd only knew
The days were slipping past
That the good things never last
That you were crying

Summer turned to winter
And the snow it turned to rain
And the rain turned into tears upon your face
I hardly recognized the girl you are today
And god I hope it's not too late
It's not too late
'Cause you are not alone
I'm always there with you
And we'll get lost together
Till the light comes pouring through
'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When your worlds crashing down
And you can't bear the thought
I said, babe, you're not lost

Life can show no mercy
It can tear your soul apart
It can make you feel like you've gone crazy
But you're not
Things have seem to changed
There's one thing that's still the same
In my heart you have remained
And we can fly fly fly away

'Cause you are not alone
And I am there with you
And we'll get lost together
Till the light comes pouring through
'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When the worlds crashing down
And you can not bear the cross
I said, baby, you're not lost
I said, baby, you're not lost
I said, baby, you're not lost
I said, baby, you're not lost