Thursday, October 29, 2009

Haunting and Butterflies

Is Your House Haunted? Questionairre

1. Do the showerheads or faucets bleed? YES NO

2. Did the previous owners die as the result of a murder or suicide? YES NO

3. Does furniture rearrange itself when you aren't looking? YES NO

4. When you reach into the refrigerator, does you

r arm appear in YES NO

another part of the house?

5. Are there Civil War-era children playing in your attic? YES NO

6. Does the house issure verbal or written warnings? YES NO

7. Does the temperature suddenly plummet if you discuss remodeling? YES NO

8. Do you feel more compelled to murder your family with an ax than YES NO

usual?

9. Are Native Americans constantly showing up to ask, "What happened to YES NO

our cemetery?"

10. Does the house contain any candelabras? YES NO

There are two things you can't change in this world: a husband who lets the dishes pile up, and a haunted house. Both lead to nothing but frustration, fear, and, eventually, a gruesome death. If the 10 Questions come back positive for a haunting, get out. Don't pack up your things. Don't go for one last dip in the half-finished swimming pool. Run. NOW.


Okay so I left myself notes that when I woke up I'd see, Do NOT eat anything Wendy, it is a fasting blood work!! So yay for post-it notes!! I brought Sam with me, she can be very calming and she knows this stuff. This is HER chosen career. Yes, she is still looking for someone to give her a job without that pesky one year of experience clause, which I find astounding. Other classmates, well I know of one, have gotten jobs, but Sam who was THE head of her class, is having troubles?!! Stupid people. So she went with me and she held my hand. She said even as we were waiting on the paperwork, I began to get paler (hard to believe I can GET paler right?). And through the whole process I got paler and paler. She said she could tell because of course the chalkiness of my skin, but the circles under my eyes got more and more pronounced. Lovely. Plus she had me eat the granola bar I brought ASAP because of my color and the fact that my cheeks were tingly.

Now this phlebotomist used a butterfly needle, these are the smallest and nicest of the needles to take blood. But she HURT me. I have a needle bruise and it hurt for way more than a second. Sandy, as we walked away of course, said the woman had done it wrong. She hadn't properly done some vein prep thing, and hadn't had me ball my fist or hold onto a squeezy thing, and I should have felt only a second of pain, and I was holding

her hand so the squeeze was way over a second's worth. It just made me proud that my sister knew this information, and shook her head when she saw my bruise. LOL! I wish someone would give her a well-deserved job, I actually think I'd go to her to have mine done from now on. And they gave me tape I am allergic to. There was no other kind, so even though it was on maybe 15 minutes, it was all red and itchy when I took it off. OY! Even I know after all these years of blood tests, butterflies are supposed to be the kindest of the blood work needles! This hurt! Bloody Olga!! You were nice but not nice TO me! Ouchies. Now I just have the dentist to endure tomorrow, plus he will want to make an appointment to get my other cavity filled, and a bone density test next Thursday. I am so tired of doctors. And if there IS something up, with my lood, heart, etc., I am so not done with them yet.

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6 meaningful meanderings:

Lee said...

You'd be surprised how often those idiots mess up the simplest things.
I've had my arm bruised 99/100 times that I've had my blood drawn.
It really gets to be infuriating.

Toriz said...

Sounds like she didn't know what she was doing, and you'd have been better off letting your sister take the blood. *Shaking head*


Hopefully all these doctor trips and such will be worth it in the end. *Hugs*

Sheri, RN said...

I have rolling veins so they take like 10 hits on each of my arm before they find the vein usually... talk about bruising and passing out ughhh it is the worst!

Anonymous said...

Oh no. :(

LadyStyx said...

There's only one "vampire" that gets it right at my clinic. Im one that panics fast. I tend to hold my breath, bracing for the brief prick of the needle...and then forget to exhale. So this one has learned this very quickly. She talks to me the whole way through and gives instructions as she goes(Ok hunny, it's time to release that fist....ok good...almost done). Very rarely leaves a mark and since I clot fast, doesnt bother with the tape...she uses that tape that only sticks to itself so it needs to be wrapped around the arm. She's fast too because she knows that my arm isnt fond of that freakin band they have to wrap around beforehand...

Unknown said...

i recently had my blood taken,
about two weeks ago, and the lady decided that she would look for the vain while the needle was in my arm... and the bruise just went away!

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